Post Marathon Blues (& Reds)

Ugh...I've been working on this darn post all week. This is just a sign of how things have been going.

But the good news is that I have my official marathon pics to bombard  you with today!

I realize I haven't been blogging that long, and I believe most people who read this blog are my friends and relatives. But for the few readers I may have lurking out there who don't know me in real life, I'm guessing by now they have probably realized that when I go days in between blog posts it's because I'm struggling and don't know what to talk about.

My absolute favorite pic. In the 'Shoe....

As it is, I feel like more of my posts are negative or talk about how this is so hard and I'm just really sick of being a broken record. But, this blog is honest and real, if nothing else. Am I perfect? Far from it. Did this blog miraculously make me change and stick to my healthy eating and exercise? Nope. But, it does keep me coming back. I enjoy blogging. It is therapeutic for me in ways. So I guess I won't worry about being a broken record and will just write what I need to write.

Prior to the marathon I worried about experiencing the "post marathon blues". The time after the marathon where you realize that you worked for 6 months to achieve this goal and, now what?? I was excited the week after the marathon to realize that I didn't feel sad at all! I was still riding on my high and excited for what was to come. I had started thinking about what's next and was making plans to achieve that.

I was struggling, but still have a smile on my face!

Fast forward to now and I realize that I am, in fact, experiencing the "post race blues". Call it whatever you like, but ever since the marathon I have been struggling. In every aspect of the word.

The races that I did the first 2 weeks after the marathon were a blessing because I actually worked out those weeks.Yup. It's THAT bad. Last weekend I was planning to do the Turkey Trot in a city near me, but when I realized on Friday night that I hadn't registered yet; I decided to pass. If it weren't for playing soccer, I would have gotten no physical activity last week.

I can't even discuss eating. It's been anything but good, and I can't seem to get back on track.

To make matters worse, my Crohn's has been flaring again. Perhaps it was the marathon; perhaps my current stress level, but whatever it is; my stomach doesn't like it. This causes a nasty cycle. (and is where the "red" in the title comes from. lovely...I know). It's very emotional for me when I don't feel well. And then everything else goes by the wayside.

And, as if I need more things, I have been very stressed lately with having too much to do and not enough time to do it in (I know, don't we all??). But, I haven't been dealing with it well. I have a much needed vacation coming up and I plan to take full advantage of it. When my vacation ends, it's time to get SERIOUS.

Call it what you will, but I know myself and I know what's realistic or what is just going to cause guilt. I know that I'm not going to get 100% back on track until after my vacation. I know that between 2 Thanksgivings and a vacation, I will not get enough on track to really call it being back on track. I know that even if I have a few good days here and there that it won't be "perfect". So, I'm not going to make a big declaration right now about how I'm going to get back on track, yadda yadda. I will try to be better. I will try to get some more activity in; but I will ENJOY myself as much as I can. I will make this decision consciously and NOT feel any guilt about it. The guilt is what gets me every time.

So, there you have it. Confession done. Moving on....